you made me uphappy
very uphappy
and its more than that
...
hurt
and disappointed

i wanted to update on zpl perf
but i have no mood at all suddenly
words tt come out under my fingers haf nth to do with e perf
my fingers have a mind of their own?
i nv could imagine that
it could affect me for so long
i thought i could take it
i thought i could forget
or maybe i could accept?
it seems like i cant

several times i wanted to talk abt it
i attempted
but i couldnt bring myself to even start the conversation
i just kept on asking myself
why are you doing it again?
i just kept on asking myself
how much do i know?
how much do i not know?
i just kept on asking myself
questions that i cant give myself an answer to

i am tired
emotionally drained
i feel like a walking corpse