so many things
so little time for myself

trauma
there was nv any injury which brings me this before
now i understand why ww says images keep on flashing
until she cannot slp at night
images of the trauma

i cant remember what happened
i still cant
but i am not trying to recall
its scary

i was trying so hard not to shed a tear
i was trying so hard to appear ok
but when i am back in room
i couldnt control anymore
the pain is nothing
i can tolerate pain
its the emotional disturbs it brings

yaya (xiao ya) says she dun wanna go back cheer
not even to visit
afraid that she will miss cheer again
totally agreed
but i still go..

i just realized
as long as i can cheer
i am happy
stunting, coaching, dancing
whatever that relates

yod asked if i wanna perform in HO
so tempted!
but i rejected haha
no time
dun wanna commit again
its hard to come out

studies?
just gotta try harder
alot harder than what i am doing now